Stream of Consciousness - Part I: Competition

I watch a contrail gently pierce the haloed moon, fog spreading the glow amorphously against the darkness of space …and I know that the magic is here again. When I get shaken, something opens up, a portal to become closer to something that I only understand on a non-intellectual level. Only discomfort can propel me there, in this dynamic space between complacency and discouragement. Hearing a new melody strikes chords that feel simultaneously familiar and unexplored; my eyes brim with tears as I absorb the energy. It draws me closer, not to someone or something—it’s nearer than that.

Just Closer.

…Comparing to satiate the craving for validity… competition—the source of tremendous energy flow which manifests as goal-driven motivation. Its rewards are empty, based on false perceptions, for what does Best really mean? It’s hardly more substantial than the paper on which it is written, only safe behind a glass frame, where it cannot be blown away or torn to shreds by elements much larger and vaster than it. The owner of the title gets framed as well, caught in the square of categorization, while everything outside it eludes him. As such, are not the "Best ones" those who can escape this confinement?

Aspiring Bests only receive teachings from Betters, contemptuously regarding Worses. Betters have accomplished specific--albeit arbitrary--goals established by aspiring Bests and are therefore highly esteemed. Aspiring Bests mimic the actions of Betters and secretly desire to surpass them, while distinguishing themselves through their accomplishments. (However, an aspiring Best can only be distinguished from other aspiring Bests in trivial categories. They contribute to the Whole in astoundingly similar ways, regardless of their status in the comparison or nature of their undertaking.)

As a result, there exists a honing of motivation towards very specific endeavors, whose existence might not serve any purpose other than to provide points of comparison to others participating in this definition of success. It lacks a true substance, which would give it Value. The birth of a Better entails the creation of a Worse in a zero-sum game of blind achievement.

A Game.

A game perhaps worth playing, at least for a little while. But those who choose never to step outside have swallowed the key to their own confinement. What exists outside then? The things so ironically and ardently sought after in the desperate attempt to achieve Best-ness. The things that both the overlooked Worses and misunderstood Betters can illuminate--for if they are non-aspiring Bests from the game world's perspective, then they may have something important to teach.

Exiting the game of aspiring Bests requires a shift in focus from specific accomplishments to general methods. Since methods arise from motivation energy, the fundamental source of this energy flow must be examined. Does it arise from artificial divisions, such as comparisons or judgments? Or does it come from something else -- perhaps insufficiently described as a nebulous warmth or nearness? Ultimately, an individual’s path to what exists outside of the game can only flow from the latter. It is the path to Value: in this sense, a quality that leads to personal and collective happiness (which can only be artificially separated.) With Value, accomplishments become progress. Achievements have substance. The progression of one contributes to the progression of the rest.

A zero-sum game, which ostensibly entails gains for some at the expense of others, ultimately results in a zero-sum for everyone. Worse, if greater gains for one individual result in a loss for increasingly more individuals, then something akin to a “negative-sum” can result. Clearly, there is no winning in a zero-sum game. This is because the individual is [something between together and separate] from others in a sense that dualistic language cannot articulate.

...

If we cannot direct our efforts with this understanding, then they will be of no true positive benefit for anyone, least of all ourselves. Competition misses the boat on this one—it takes talented individuals and distracts them from accomplishing something potentially Great by entangling them in a race against each other towards a meaningless goal. A universal loss. But what if individual talent were not judged or compared, but rather combined with other complementary talents in a collaborative effort? Then our differences in approach and style would be appreciated for the true Value that they hold and employed as such, instead of destroyed by a desire to conform to a single standard of “greatness,” for no other purpose than to derive personal worth from a diminished perception of quality in others.